Falling Into the Black Whole
[Level 2: Mystical] What happens when you get too close to God
They call it a black hole, but that's only because they're observing from the outside. From the inside? It's the Black Whole—the singularity where all separation collapses into union.
Let me explain.
Imagine you are floating out in space, drifting towards the center of a galaxy. You see a void with light bending around it and you drift closer in curiosity—until you realize you're being pulled in. And that pull has become irresistible. By the time you realize this, you've crossed the event horizon. And there's no going back.
From the outside, awakening looks like death.
It is.
It's the death of the old self, the old narrative. The ego dissolves. The personality softens. The attachments release. The desires fall away.
But from the inside? Awakening feels like being torn apart by an irresistible force, like being pulled towards something awfully greater than thought can contain.
It's falling into a black hole.
To those outside its reach, they don't feel the tug. But I drifted towards the black hole, got caught in its gravity, and now am falling towards it so fast it's spaghettifying my personality. Meanwhile, to those closest to me, I'm trapped on the event horizon, motionless and lifeless. But from my perspective? My atoms are being shredded from the sheer force of the pull.
Both are true. But they look wildly different from across the event horizon. And once that threshold is crossed? There's no return, only the terrifying yet irresistible inevitability of union so immediate that time itself stops making sense—because at that point there is no more separation. No observer. No observed. Only the singularity—which bears no witnesses because there's no one left to witness.
P.S.
Content note: The following is a journal entry from 4 months into daily meditation. It describes a direct mystical experience that I didn't have language for at the time. If direct transmission language feels too far, the post stands on its own without it. But if you've ever experienced something similar and thought you were losing your mind—this is for you.
I then saw pictured before me a door.
"Knock and it shall be open unto you.”
I Am that I Am. There is no door.
And with that magic command, the door instantly vanished and I was sucked into my Self. I felt a return to my Self. The unexplainable ease.…
I have been sucked into the Black Hole. The same one Eckhart Tolle must have been sucked into. There is no thing or any thing.
Singularity.
Everything has canceled out. Matter has obliterated antimatter. Or rather it never did.
Time makes no sense here. Nothing ever happens yet everything happened.
Infinite possibilities. Truly infinity... it's true peace.
— Journal Entry, August 31, 2022
I only realized now that Eckhart Tolle described his experience in an almost identical manner in The Power of Now (a book I read in college but didn't truly understand until I lived it):
I felt drawn into what seemed like a vortex of energy. It was a slow movement at first and then accelerated. I was gripped by an intense fear, and my body started to shake. I heard the words “resist nothing,” as if spoken inside my chest. I could feel myself being sucked into a void. It felt as if the void was inside myself rather than outside. Suddenly, there was no more fear, and I let myself fall into that void.
— The Power of Now, Introduction
Same void. Same singularity. Same Black Hole.
